Cause it's funny

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter. She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife? He answers, " You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper. So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she.

Come now you must admitt that is kinda funny.

It doesn't matter what you do, so long as you change something from the way it was before you touched it into something that's like you after you take your hands away.

Huh?

I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.

Life's lessons

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:
1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.

GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:
1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its round.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.

SUCCESS:
At age 4 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 17 success is . . . having a drivers licence.
At age 35 success is . . having money.
At age 50 success is . . having money.
At age 70 success is . . having a drivers licence.
At age 75 success is . . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.
Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way;

BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day.
Have a wonderful day with many *smiles*

Has it been that long?

So I'm finally sitting down to say something. I've been fairly busy as of late with work and that. Both Susy and I hadn't really had a day off to speak of. We did enjoy Sunday off, which was a first in awhile. We spent it seeing her family and friends then off to see my parents in the evening. Not my friends thought, I don't have any. No thats not true I do but I've somehow managed to sneek in some visits in there.
Last night I went to bed around 0400 (thats AM for those of you that have no idea what the 24 hour clock is) because I have to work four overnights in a row starting tonight. This morning I wake up at 0800 thinking I had to work. This means I've worked way too much lately, its time for a break. Ironically all that work was my vacation. I do have more coming up though, the end of the month I think.
So my roommate, Shawn, announced to me that he's going to be moving out at the end of July. Originally he said June but changed it so I had a little more time to think about what I wanted to do. I still don't really know. I have two viable options. One is a short term move so its actually sounding like the more likely one. Its not where I want to be but it will save me some money. So I may live there until the new year or something and then move out to Abby. I dread that drive from Abby to Vanc but I figure I only work four days a week downtown and all my friends are out that way, and most importantly Susy is out there and once she starts school in Septemeber even I'm not going to see her much unless I'm close by.
I'm also in the thought patterns to start looking for a new job. The convention centre where I work isn't going in the direction I agree with and I figure instead of staying on there and being miserable I should move on. I love the job, I love what I do, but management is taking the wrong direction I think and already its made my job a nightmare. So yeah I guess lots going on in my life right now in the thinking department. I said to Sus a couple of months ago that I wanted a change in my life, I felt I needed to move and needed a new direction in my job. Guess I felt all this coming or something. Oh well, if theres one thing I've realized in my life its that 'it all works out in the end.' So I won't loose any sleep over it, but its still there.